Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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