What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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