What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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