Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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