This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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