I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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