I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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