I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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