A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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