A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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