Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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