Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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