Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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