"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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