"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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