Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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