How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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