How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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