How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.

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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.




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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!


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