How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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