How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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