How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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