How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.

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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?

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