How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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