How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats

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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.

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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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