How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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