How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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