How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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