How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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