How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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