How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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