How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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