How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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