How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.

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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.

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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk

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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.

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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan

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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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