How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.

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