How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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