How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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