How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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