How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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