How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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