How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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