How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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