How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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