How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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