How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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