How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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