How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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