How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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