How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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