How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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