How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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