How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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