How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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