How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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