How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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