How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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