How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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