How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."

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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)

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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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