How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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