How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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