How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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