How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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