How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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A seal walks into a club...
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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