How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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