How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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