How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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