How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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