How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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