How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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