How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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