How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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