How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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