How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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