How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.

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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.

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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.

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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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