How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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