How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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