How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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