How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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