How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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