How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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