How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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