How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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