How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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