How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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