How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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