How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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