How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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